There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Randomize
