Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize