then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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