I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
