we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize