He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize
