If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Randomize