If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize