I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Come share oat with me in your robe
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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