I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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