I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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