I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
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