let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
