My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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