i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
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