hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
