Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
