then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
