I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize