oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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