I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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