My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
It's shark week go big or go home
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Randomize
