My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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