also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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