Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Randomize
