If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize