Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Randomize
