I wanna bring you to show and tell
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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