are you still at the devil's house?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
