I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
