I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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