Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
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