Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
