Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
