Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
