So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I think my moral compass just broke
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
