how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize