You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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