We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize