You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize