I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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