so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
