Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
