He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Randomize
