Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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