i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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