what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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