Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
