He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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