**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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