If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
